Suffering due to non-acceptance.

When a child is born or even with the excitement of when a pregnancy is announced, a parent envisions what kind of future they want for their child.

This may be a particular hobby or sport they really enjoyed themselves as a child, taking over a family business or the ambition of a successful career that they want their child to have as they themselves may have not been able to reach that goal or did reach that goal and find it to be the only way life should be lived. This way they already pre-determine their child’s future with all the things they want for their child.

However when that child does not show an interest in any of the things the parents had envisioned for him/her, this may often be seen as either completely unacceptable and/or brings enormous grief or even guilt as in the feeling that they’ve failed raising their child somehow and the child may be blamed for that through non-acceptance and non-approval.

Even though this way of raising children has been more prominent in the older traditional households, today’s parenting styles that are based on the traditional methods that have been passed down from generation to generation still reflects this quite often.

What they are not aware of however is that their child is not an extension of themselves, but an individual with possibly a completely different interest in hobbies, work field and even choice of sexuality and partners.

Non-acceptance of a child’s authentic self and the interests he or she may have is not going to facilitate a relationship based on connection and in the later years may even turn the adult child away from the parent as he or she may rather not spend time with those that do not accept him or her.

On a deeper subconscious level, when a child is not accepted and supported for whom he or she is at the most crucial learning and emotional developmental stages of life, this may cause emotional immaturity and a deep seated need for acceptance externally through self-sabotaging behaviors in the adolescent and adult years to meet that insatiable need that wasn’t given as a child without being consciously aware of it. For example; the child may become a people-pleasing adult as they may have the belief that pleasing others, offers them acceptance, or once they reach an age where they start dating, they may behave a certain way that meets the need for acceptance by their partner, even though it is not who they are authentically.

It all comes down to the inability to accept themselves for who they are as they have learned from an early age that who they are is not acceptable and thus living an inauthentic life becomes the norm.

On an energetic level, this can cause blockages in the throat chakra where the flow of life energy is restricted and dis-ease may be created.